Gone in the morning

Audrey died in the moring, seventeen years ago today.

She who had walked in the valley of the shadow for most of her childhood lived on to the age of 34 and then quietly died in the early morning hours of September 26, 1992.

The rest of the story...

Sorry. I had meant to continue with Audrey's story but life has a way of happening, y'know?

While I wait for the video version of her story to load up, let me fill you all in on the story of Audrey Natalia.

Audrey was born on March 1, 1958. She was full term, weighed in at 8 pounds and some ounces. She was healthy and feisty with blue eyes and a head full of reddish gold hair.

Mom and Dad had wanted to name her "Natalia" which means, "Nativity" or "the beginning" because for all intents and hopes, she would be the first of many more children.

However, some well meaning and helpful souls pointed out that "Natalia" was an unusual name that could get mispronounced and all her life people would be asking her,

"Now how is it you spell your name?"

and one wouldn't want that to happen to their daughter, would one? What to do? Mom recalled seeing a name on the side of a bakery truck for a line of baked goods by "Lil' Audrey" so the sleek and unique "Natalia" got shoved to the middle position and the dear, sweet sounding name, "Audrey" went to the head of the line. In the end, this name fit better somehow for this chubby cheeked little charmer.

She would still be the first of many of course.

Life happens...

Ah, the video is loaded now. You can see for yourself how she was. Such a darling little baby, such a camera FLIRT!

"She knows what a camera is for", Mother wrote in her journal. Gee, ya think? Hello, Ivory Snow! Forget that Brookie Cookie Shields kid, here would have been your goldmine!

As is common with the first born, every waking moment is recorded to film. In this manner, one can see that there is not one thing wrong with the child. Mom was very good at making sure sister was fed properly and up to date on all of her vaccinations, especially the polio jab. Mother was herself a survivor of the dread disease and no way would her baby girl be put thru that trial if she could help it.

She marks it in the baby book, all the lists of doctor visits, what shot was administered on what date. The 3rd dose of the Salk Polio is given in May, 1959 at Iowa Methodist Hospital.

Years later, in a medical journal that was meant only for those privileged few of the white jackets, an article relates how, in the spring of 1959, a laboratory in the south released a batch of the Salk Polio into the market that had been contaminated. A list follows of where some of the batch wound up and some of it lands in Des Moines, IA, Iowa Methodist Hospital.

And some of it landed in Audrey's plump little arm...

The changes are so little at first. One eye begins to wander a bit and this is captured in a photo from June. July; Audrey is often seen with one hand in her hair, tugging at those golden strands ever so slightly...

August. The once bright smile is gone. She looks upset, on edge. She raises her arms above her head as if to shoo the camera away from her. By September, the eyes have dulled, what some term the "one hundred yard stare" has set in.

Audrey on a merry-go-round, September, 1959. After this, the pictures stop.

The pictures start up again at Thanksgiving, 1959. Mom is holding a child, looks like a little boy, a very odd little boy at that with too short hair and a missed beat in his eyes. He smiles and in that smile, there is something familiar...

It's Audrey.

She smiles again now. The folks force something that passes for upturned lips for the camera, for the congregation...for each other. Only Audrey smiles and means it. What ever this was that came upon her, it's over now. She is the way she is going to be for the next 33 years of her life and all the tears and prayers in the world, not even that of Oral Roberts, is going to change this.

This has happened. This is here to stay.

This has happened

So this is where I came in with this long day's journey into night already in progress. The doctors in Iowa City, (so called "Mecca" of medical wisdom in the day for that part of the world), had already passed judgement and basically pronounced Audrey as a lost cause best left up to God.

Ok, they didn't say it quite like that. To be fair, the doctor that spoke to the folks was more gentle than that. He was in fact, very quiet and soft when he told them that to be honest, he didn't know what in the world was the matter with Audrey but he did know one thing:

"Whatever this is, it is killing her. She is dying," he said.
"Take her home and let her die."

And so they took her home. And Audrey got a little better, then a little worse, then some better, then a lot better. An doctor of osteopathic medicine had begun to do treatments on her to which she responded very well. This was followed by an extended stay at a facility, now since gone, in Denver, CO where she responded even more. In fact, the mood was getting brighter all the time as Audrey could once again move about freely, focus on the world around her and show an interest in eating.

(This renewed appetite came following the laying on of hands by Oral Roberts. From what I have read, many recipients of prayer from Oral came away with a profound new love of food. They still couldn't walk, see or hear but boy, they sure could eat! Someone should do a study on this)

Audrey could walk again with the aid of a walker. The one shown in the picture is the same one that she came home from Denver in. As she grew, the walker did too, aided and abetted by more pipe and bits being welded to the frame.

Yes, Audrey is very skinny in the picture, isn't she? She could eat like a horse but most of the food had a tendency to come right back up. Her diet had to be very soft and easy to digest in an effort to at least get some nourishment to stay inside of her.

By the time I came along, this is how Audrey was; stick thin and in frail health. Yet the smile was almost always there. On good days, she was full of energy and high spirits, laughter and fun.

Audrey had fun? Oh certainly she did. She was smart too, let me tell you.
For example, she figured out how to turn on the gas stove by pushing the edge of walker against the dial at just the right angle. This in turn would cause a pretty blue light to come on! A pretty, dancing blue flame that she could watch up close.

This went on for awhile. She'd turn on her own private ballet in blue then get bored with it and amble off. Mom would come in, find the burner lit and assume that the resident toddler had performed this offense. Resident toddler would get scolded and told to stay away from the stove which the resident toddler had no interest in to begin with. Finally one day, Mom caught sister in the act and about had a heart attack.

This produced a new game; batter the baby gate. Mom strung up a baby gate in front of the kitchen entrance to keep Audrey away from the stove. Audrey took this challenge in stride and soon figured out that her walker could be used as a battering ram. Oh joy!

I can still see her in my mind's eye; Audrey slowly sliding around the dinning room floor, looking at the baby gate, observing its position. Scooting back, she'd get the gate in her sites so to speak, stand up to full height and run at top speed. The walker would slip and slide and then BAM! crash up against the gate which in turn buckled and had it not been for the kitchen chairs fortifying the works from behind, surely would have given way to the invading forces of Audrey the army of one. Oo-rah!

There came at last a day of victory. The gate could only take so much abuse and one fine afternoon, the sound of splintering wood and screeching wheels filled the house. Audrey came sliding at top speed into the promised land of the kitchen, eyes shinning with triumph, pushing the vanquished gate before her like a train of the old west with a bovine riding its cow-catcher.
Victory!

And did I mention?

That I am ever so proud of the up to ONE MILLION of my fellow, "right wing domestic terrorists" that swept into DC today.

GOD SPEED!!!

Ground Rules

My blog.
I will post what I like on my blog.
You don't like it,
leave.

Period.

There is no need to post holier than thou remarks or really any remark at all if you don't agree with what I believe. Remember, you will get back all that you give.

The Shout Heard Round the World!!

YOU LIE!!!

And with those words, the average, hard working, tax paying AMERICAN was heard in no uncertain terms in the marbled, pretencions halls of our so called elected govt.

A hero has been made in this moment! GO JOE!!!

Effects of the Son

This morning saw yet another eerie sunrise in LA, eerie yet beautiful.

Wanting to get the full impact of this, I hastened to the nearest hillside that could afford me a full view of the sky. Trouble was, I would have to turn my back to the show unfolding in the clouds as I hiked up the hill.

I tried walking backwards which is actually a very good work out for the legs and rear end but at the rate I was going, it would take longer so I turned round and started hoofing it again wishing I didn't have to miss this.

I soon discovered that I didn't have to miss a thing; the effects of the rising red sun could be seen all around me as it lit up the houses, the trees and the hill beyond in a surreal rosy glow.

Then it hit me: this was like faith. I have never seen the Lord face to face but I can see his effect. I can see it in nature, I can see it in my fellow man and in me.

I can also tell the effects of no son just as surely as one can see the effects that no sunlight can work in humans and in plants.

Now I am not the first to have a revaluation like this, nor will I be the last but for me, this thought was pretty powerful.

Awhile back, I had gotten into one of those circular arguments over in that dive bar of a website, God Like Productions which, unlike its name would seemingly imply, is not Christ Like in nature.
A poster was going off on Christians, snarling in Arial point font;

"And how do you know your precious Jesus wasn't just a fairy tale???"

I replied to him;
"By Faith"
and then went off to look at other threads. Awhile later I came back to the poster's question to find that he had told me in no uncertain terms just what he thought about me, my faith and what I could do with said faith that involved sticking it somewhere the sun does not often shine.

Someone better at this kind of thing than I had taken up the conversion so I went on but never the less I wondered, how does one explain faith to someone who has none? I wish now I could share this example with him or her.

Huffing and puffing and sweaty, I reached the top of the hill. Turing around, what little breath I had left was about taken away in the glory that lay open before me. The sun, now losing its redness never the less still painted the clouds beneath in shades of rose and pink with touches of blue.
The water on the harbor shone like a jewel, patches of silvered light here and there. I watched as a freighter put out to open water. A slight breeze stirred carrying in it a teasing scent of rain.

No, I have never seen the son, but in all things, I have seen his effect.